“He taught me to be ambitious, to want to have fun in bed and to have stimulating intellectual exchanges”

First day

There is no photo on his Grindr profile. This application designed for gay dating offers me a mosaic of people according to my geolocation. It is really “fuck with your neighbor”, to satisfy a pressing need in the place where we are.

When I open Grindr on this beach in the Southwest where I’m on vacation, I’m not necessarily in the rush to report. The day before, I took my boyfriend back to the station. We were early, he didn’t want me to wait for the train with him. Already I had had to insist a lot that he gives me a very small weekend during the holidays, I no longer feel too indebted to him. I’m disappointed. As we esteem each other, we make efforts towards each other, but it does not stick between us, especially sexually.

It’s not been that long since I’ve seen men, but it’s sure that, on that side, it’s easier to have sex for sex. That day, I’m not on the hunt, but his profile catches my attention. We chat quickly and well, we send each other pictures, he’s cute. Flirting is nice and easy. He does not know the area, I am from there. Through the interface of the app, I improvise my vacation guide, I recommend cool places. We neither know if we are going to meet.

“The“ one shot ”like that, in general, it’s just for the discharge and the enjoyment, everyone is quite selfish in the search for his pleasure. With him, there is this fluidity which means that there is something that circulates ”

Two days later, I finished my surf session. I take my shower at the beach, rinse my salt-encrusted wetsuit. My face is white with sunscreen, my hair is wet. He suggests that I stay in the apartment he is renting for the holidays with a friend who is not there. It’s available now. With gay men, we don’t have a drink before, we are much more direct. Without doing bad sociology, I have the impression that we are conditioned to satisfy our desires more quickly, whereas in straight relationships, before sex, there are cafes and restaurants, everything that makes the connection socially acceptable. Homos don’t mind that, they go for dinner together afterwards, when they want to see each other again.

He opens the towel door for me, gets out of the shower. His apartment overlooks the beach, filled with the mess of two friends on vacation who don’t stay there long and just sleep there. We talk about our ages, about which we both lied in the app. I put 35 years old, I am 37, I can not lower it any more with my beard and my white hair appearing. He is also 37 years old, but he has indicated that he is 33, he can afford it, he is blond with smooth skin.

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